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Kinder brauchen Eltern die sie lieben und für sie da sind
Gestern traf ich einen jungen Mann Mitte Dreißig wieder und er telefonierte gerade kurz mit seiner Tochter und deren Mutter. Er wirkte sehr gelöst und glücklich. Das war so schön anzusehen, hatten die Beiden sich doch vor zwei Jahren etwas unschön getrennt und die letzten Monate mit viel Streit und Anschuldigungen verbracht. Gerichtsprozesse, Streit, Beratungsstellen bis hin zu gegenseitigen Anzeigen bei der Polizei. Was war geschehen?
Er war in den letzen zwei Jahren in einer Beziehung, in der er es nicht geschafft hatte, er selbst zu sein. Er hat versucht, auch seiner neuen Freundin alles Recht zu machen und hat sich dabei selbst verraten. Nur fiel ihm das lange selbst kaum auf. Er wurde immer unglücklicher, bis er mit Unterstützung klarer sehen konnte und sich trennte.
Heute hat er die Mechanismen bei sich erkannt, die auch in der neuen Beziehung wirkten. Er weiß, dass ER entscheidet, wo seine Grenze ist und er es in der Hand hat, wie er mit der Mutter seiner Tochter umgeht. Beiden ist ihr Kind wichtig und sie haben es geschafft, einen respektvollen Umgang miteinander zu finden.
Sein Fazit:
- Leider hat es zwei Jahre gedauert und es war für alle Beteiligten nicht leicht. Vor allem seiner Tochter hätte er gerne so Einiges erspart.
- Gerichtsentscheidungen und Termine bei einer Beratungsstelle waren nicht so hilfreich, wie erhofft.
Was hat ihm geholfen?
- gute Gespräche,
- Eigenverantwortung übernehmen,
- Recht-haben-wollen loslassen und
- schauen, was einem selbst gut tut (Freunde, Sport, Ernährung, seine Tochter...)
um nur Einiges zu nennen.
Ich wünsche den beiden Eltern von ganzem Herzen, dass sie es auch die nächsten Jahre schaffen, die bestmögliche Variante ihrer selbst zu sein, um ihre Tochter beim Großwerden zu begleiten.
Eine professionelle Trennungsbegleitung kann Schlimmeres verhindern und ermöglicht es, mit dem anderen Elternteil in Frieden die gemeinsamen Kinder großzuziehen und darüber hinaus einen Haufen Geld für Anwälte und Gericht zu sparen.
Gerne begleite ich auch Sie auf Ihrem Weg. Einfach einen Termin vereinbaren.
Alles Liebe, Karen Lorenz
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